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Monday, December 30, 2013

Crash

All it takes is one instant. One moment in time and life can be changed forever.
Sometimes the change can be beautiful. The moment my husband and I realized we were going to be parents was a scary, but beautiful change. Graduating from high school and then college: both beautiful life changing moments.
Then there are moments you wish the universe would never create. Ones that leave you wanting to curl up in a ball kicking and screaming about how unfair life is. Those times when you realize how precious life is and that while you can you must cherish your loved ones, before it’s too late. An utter cliché, I know, but there is a reason so many people seize upon the phrase.
For our family, that instant came on December 9th. On that day, driving the same route to work he has for over 30 years, in one fateful moment my father in law was in a terrible accident, an accident which claimed his life.  One moment and a husband, father, grandpa was gone, leaving us with an aching hole in our hearts.
A hole that grows every time I think of the plans we had for the future. It grows when I think of my husband, who so admired his dad. It grows for my son, who will probably not remember the grandpa who would take him on tractor rides and have light saber fights, except through the memories we will help him recall. It grows for my mother in law, who was struggling with an empty nest after our leaving and now has to bear the pain of being alone, without the love she was married to for over 30 years. 
And it grows for me, who mourns the most amazing father in law a girl could have. A father in law who would pick up dog poop for me so that my weak arms wouldn’t shake , a father in law who would teach me how to properly wax my car so that it would be shiny.  A father in law that taught me the value of a good gnarly donut. The kind of father in law who wouldn’t always know how to show his emotions, but proved he cared in the small things he did. A father in law who was so looking forward to visiting the PNW that he had tourist catalogs arriving so he could plan his trip to see us {after we had only been gone a few weeks}. There are so many moments I mourn for and wish that it could have only been an instant different.
Through this pain, I hope that we can emerge stronger and embrace the fragility of life. This isn’t my first encounter with the loss of a loved one, but it is the first one that really made me question what I do with my life. Never miss a moment to show people you love them; tomorrow is never promised. It can all come crashing down in just one instant.

6 comments:

Jen said...

I'm so sorry. I can't even imagine.

Meg Doherty said...

Moira, I am so so sorry for your loss. Life really is so fragile, and we all tend to forget that.

Munchkins and the Military said...

Wow. I am so sorry for your family's loss. It's so hard to lose a parent. Prayers for all of you.

chambanachik said...

I'm so very sorry, Moira. He sounds like the best father in law you could have had, and I'm glad you had that time with him. <3

Fran said...

I'm so, so sorry. He sounds like such a great man, you're so lucky to have had him <3

Jennifer said...

I'm so sorry, Moira. He sounds like he was a really amazing man.

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